Headlong into loving madness

I have often bitched about the state of marriage, mainly how it changes a relationship.

But I have to say my husband is an amazing person.

Everyday, he willingly embraces my children, both literally, figuratively and emotionally. He has decided, (and no I cannot give you a good reason) that my children and I are worth loving. Now, you could say "Well, of course they are, Snead!"

But, really, think about it.

When you take on a woman with kids, you take on her baggage, her divorce and her ex-husband, her financial set up and her pain.

You take on the kids themselves, their daily ups and down. In my case, you take on one adorable autistic boy and one equally beautiful ADD girl. Both kids having endured the scars of divorce, the daily life of disabilities, and a mom who makes overbearing look like a Disney afternoon special.

You take on their future troubled teen years, countless dollars that flow out for sports events, field trips and shopping at the mall. You do parties, homework, discipline and heartache. And in Harry's case, the trials and struggles are easy now. The hard is to come because he could be with us all our lives.

Everyday this man tells my boy "Harry, you can do it. I will help you." Tells me not mother the kids, they need to learn. Brings home candy just because. Hands out lunch money, bedtime kisses, and lectures on the importance of good grades.

My husband has decided this life, my life, is one worth sharing.

"Kathy, you have great kids," hubby always says. "You shouldn't worry so much."

Oh, but worrying is what I do. It's my thing, my art, unfortunately. And believe me, I love my children with a passion driven by God. But I worry, even so.

My husband decided out of love and hope to take on my life and all that will come. I don’t think anyone can really understand how amazing that is.

But sometimes clarity brightens my sight to see a man running, arms open, into this madness. He chooses love. Would that we all would do so.

Where is my John Wayne?
Where is my prairie son? Where is my happy ending?
Where have all the cowboys gone?

Right here. (Giddy up!) And no words could express how much I love this man. And it will take all my days to show him.